I've been getting into TEDtalks lately. I don't know if anyone reading this has seen them, but basically, they're 18-20 minute talks on a range of different subjects. Interesting subjects. I know this will seem UnAmerican, but they get you thinking about different things you might not necessarily think about, which, UnAmerican as that is, is a good thing.
One of the topics I've been perusing lately is womens' rights and feminism. I believe it's an important subject, because I am one, but I think it should be just as important to men as well. Why? Well...I'll tell you my opinion on that, and just let you all formulate your own.
Last week, I got this post on my FaceBook feed:
I thought it was pretty succinct given the recent opinions of certain politicians. I also thought that it was good to point out to men that the excuses of "she dressed liked she wanted it" showed that men are basically being told they are stupid lumps of clay that can't control their impulses....kinda like babies can't control their poo. It's not their fault, their sphincters are weak.
And apparently, so are men.
Which got me into the TEDtalks. Not that I hadn't been watching them before, but now I was looking for talks on women and education, violence, and misogyny in general. And I wanted the flip side of misogyny: misandry, or for normal people, the hatred of men.
I believe these two things really walk hand in hand now, but they look very different. We all can recognize mysogyny: rape, domestic violence, in some countries not letting girls get educated or aborting female fetuses because they don't have the weight a male fetus does, etc.
But what about misandry? It can be just as blatant, but I think more of it is very subtle, like this rape statement on FaceBook. It implies that men can't control themselves, that they are children saying "she made me do it!", that there is no reason for impulse control. It's very damaging to men really, and return, damaging to women.
The next place my thoughts turned to was education. Here in the US, we don't really have the problem of not sending our girls to school. Our problem is that now, girls are outperforming guys in school. Especially college. It seems that girls finally get it- if you have a better education, you yourself will be better off. As a matter of fact, there was a huge study done awhile back on this, and the results reported about men in regards to this is really disheartening. It is in an article titled "The End of Men" in the Atlantic from 2010.
What did it show? Well, women were out educating and out working their men, and while good for women, it looks bad for men. They are now "lost". Why? The article pointed to men gravitating towards physical jobs, and those jobs are being shipped out of the country, or laying off workers, and there seems to be no where for men to turn. (but, just as a side note, there are always physical jobs, nurse, trucker, stockboy, trash collectors, janitors)
No where? Can't go back to school? Women do that all the time! Uh oh. Women. Do. That. All. The. Time.
It's interesting, the article talks about how much men invest in their work, and how much more devastating it is when they get laid off because men's worth is very much tied into their status as a "breadwinner". And don't get me wrong, I very much understand this. But the article also pointed to how much men do not roll with the punches and devise a new plan, a new way to be the breadwinner. They get depressed, drink, cheat, blame their spouses, abuse the people around them, and get divorced because they can't get over or move on from their pain.
Unfortunately, to go hand in hand with this blow, is also the seeming "dependent generation" of men. You know the ones: still live at home after high school, play video games all day, don't have a job and not looking for one, aren't in college, only live to paaaaarty. Is it just me, or are there more of these guys every day? Of course women are going to outperform guys, if this is what they've decided to do!
Now, don't get all mad at me, I know I'm not talking about every guy, and I know economic situations are tough, I was a single mom of 2 for cryin' out loud, but somehow, it feels all of a sudden, like we aren't expecting very much out of our men. Misandry. Makes 'em all look like dumbass loosers, and they're not.
And then I had a startling thought related to that FaceBook post: That story, that "oldest story in the Bible" of an evil women getting everyone thrown out of the garden? It's just another story about men having no control over themselves. Imagine what would be if Adam just said to Eve, "I won't do that because I know its wrong."
Remember, it's just a ride.